No-Show Monday

Almost halfway through the Fringe! My body is running on two parts gin, one part sheer determination at this stage, and it's only going to get worse... Today is No-Show Monday and my first day off. Annoyingly that means there's a limited choice of shows to catch up on today.

We're having the busiest Fringe in years. I keep saying that it feels like Edinburgh is busier than normal and apparently I'm not just being jaded and cynical, it really is. My venue has had more people through it's doors already this month than in the whole of August last year. It's mind-boggling. And exhausting. And exciting. And tiring.
Even more surprising than the number of people buzzing around town is the fact that there's only been two days of rain so far.

The rain always brings out the worst in audiences. An American man (who called me over by asking if I was 'a manager sort of person.') informed me that queueing outside was unacceptable considering we have a perfectly fine 'covered area.' When I explained to him that this covered area was, in fact, a fire exit and unsuitable to hold upwards of sixty people he replied, 'I'm sure if there was a fire, they'd get out of there pretty sharp.' Yes. Because that's the point. The rain has also brought out the worst in me I fear. There's nothing I hate more than a queue jumper. Some audiences will stand outside in the pouring rain, freezing cold, at all hours of the day, waiting to get into a venue. And others will hover under the safety of umbrellas or bar covers and run into the queue as soon as it starts to move. I hate those people. I shouted at a large group of them the other day. Of course, they don't care, but it made me feel a little better.

I thought I should start sharing some of the things that have happened to me thus far this Fringe. The first is sort of funny but also sort of not. During the load-in of a sold out show on Friday night a drunk patron walked up to me and said, 'Wow, you look like my future ex-wife.' Charming. There's nothing like a late night comedy show and cheap beer to bring out the real quality in people. The second was the other night when a group of customers almost started a fight in our theatre because someone was saving a seat. Talking that situation down was as ridiculous as it sounds. I've had several people swear in my face and brandish their tickets at me instead of letting me check them. (Several times a day I'll try to tear a ticket and have to do so whilst it remains in the clutches of it's owner, who seems to think that despite my radio and staff ID, I'm going to steal their ticket and run away.) Then there have been the complaints. I've been told that I don't know how to do my job because we ask people to queue. I've been informed that our tickets are too expensive. I've been asked to give a refund because they arrived too late to get access into a no-latecomers performance. Each day I've fended off complaints about the sight lines in my venue. Customers seem surprised when I explain that I literally cannot do anything but apologise about any of this. I am completely powerless.

However on another note there have been lots of nice things said about the team I work with and about the shows we have on in our venue. It's just annoying because I rarely remember when I hear something positive but being yelled at can stay with me for the rest of the day.

On to the final two weeks of the Fringe.

Top shows from this week
Ross and Rachel @ George Square
Antigone @ The King's Theatre